this isn’t for you…

I have to apologize for leaving you for over two weeks. To be honest, it wasn’t writers block or something that obvious. Whenever I came back to do a post I read the post on repetition and couldn’t convince myself to write anything beyond what was written. When it comes to matters regarding the self I truly believe that in this day and age there are only two things that we can talk about: repetition and community. I’ve been wanting to hold off on talking about the importance of community so I’ve been stuck… with repetition. For now, I want to say something short, but I promise that more (a lot more) is coming in the next day or two.

Repetition: it is the honest persistence of ONE THING. Find one thing worth committing to and give up putting your hope and faith in all other things which seem desirable. I mean, how have you done chasing many things? Is it panning out for you? Have you learned how to cope with difficult situations? Have you had to cope with difficult situations? Or have you simply moved to something else and not dealt with the difficulty?

Your heart can only have one master. It is impossible to will two things! You may not realize that yet; you may die without ever realizing that. Many people live their whole life without committing to one thing, because they truly believed they can handle two things.

But repetition is the willing of one thing. It is a commitment. And commitment does not involve a percentage of your heart. It is an either/or. Repetition is a full commitment and it does not fluctuate through argument and struggle: it bends, but it does not break.

You have to be willing to give up everything in order to live for just ONE THING. The real challenge, however, comes when that ONE THING proves itself to be wrong. And no one can tell you that the ONE THING is wrong. Your preacher, your teacher, your parents, your best friend, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your therapist…no one can convince you that what you have committed to is wrong; no one, that is, except yourself! Because they are not you and they don’t know the meaning of that ONE THING and what it means for you.

This idea of repetition may not resonate with you; it may just sound like inarticulate gurgling. It may all sound like it is over-thought-out and/or needless. That’s fine. Close the window; I actually think that most of the people reading this (yourself included) probably aren’t ready for commitment. There are only a few people that are willing to commit and they’re usually the people who have realized that the search for happiness, in the end, just leads to misery and, sometimes, despair!

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